published in The Fauquier Times-Democrat Weekend on April 22, 2011
Sugar is to your physical health as the Easter Bunny is to your _________. Just thought I’d mix things up with a little analogy. Sugar has been multitasking lately: It’s been in the news almost as much as it’s been in your food. Oh, please! Don’t act like you didn’t know it was in your salad as well as in your ketchup. And please don’t tell me you’ve been putting ketchup on your salad.
I also remind you that it is the season of standardized testing. Easter is here too, even though it took its sweet time. Had it arrived any later, retailers would be juxtaposing pastel candy eggs with red-and-and-blue paraphernalia. Maybe Easter decided to be Indian this year.
Good job trying to dodge the question. So, how would you complete this analogy? Sugar is to your Physical Health as the Easter Bunny is to your _______________…
a) Mental Health
b) Dental Health
c) Spiritual Health
d) Worldly Wealth
Let me help you a little. Immediately, you can cross off Mental Health and Dental Health because those choices rhyme. Test makers don’t want you getting cutesy with them; so don’t expect them to be cutesy with you. No rhymes.
You can cross off Worldly Wealth because there’s way too much alliteration going on, and this is no poetry contest. It’s a test. Remember? Also, you will notice that it is the only one that wavers from an ending of “Health” into “Wealth,” so that should alert you automatically that it must be wrong.
So, by sheer elimination, the correct answer must be c): Spiritual Health. Sugar is to your physical health as the Easter Bunny is to your spiritual health.
Walking through the store this week, I found myself increasingly annoyed by all the sugary treats crowding the aisles. Correction: I am annoyed with myself, and my face probably showed it. I couldn’t smile. Not completely. That’s because my face was still half-numb for the fillings for my cavities. I know. I have shown off about having a sweet tooth. Now I can show off about having decaying teeth.
I deserved it. This school year, I have kept myself awake at odd hours with little “injections” of sugar – mostly that hard cinnamon candy that isn’t the greatest for your dental health or your waistline. What waistline? I know. Yes, there comes a time to pay.
So, I’m walking around, metaphorically and literally in a state of semi-numbness. I am surrounded by chocolate bunnies, marshmallow peeps, pastel-wrapped chocolates, malted eggs, jellybeans, and chocolate crosses, of all things. And these things are jeering at me. Want some more candies, little girl? Or not-so-little girl?
I’m annoyed with myself for being annoyed. I feel like the Scrooge of Easter, but what’s going to be next? Are manufacturers going to give us pastel pasta sauce with which to celebrate the season? How about some cross-shaped noodles?
And again, I’m annoyed at my annoyance. Half way around the world, people are reeling from the after effects of violent earthquakes, aftershocks, tsunamis and nuclear meltdowns. In North Carolina, people are suffering heartache over lost lives and lost homes. I am concerned about the abundance of Easter candy.
The very fact that I can go casually to the store to select foods that are available in abundance, can raise my eyebrow at the ever-inching price of gasoline, (but not to the point that I’ve ditched driving), and can contemplate the price difference between nectarines and peaches, neither of which are local or in season here, is a little dismaying.
How can life be like this? Why do we live in a world with such a dichotomy?
And now I realize the root of my annoyance. I have a myriad of reasons to be overflowing with gratitude. I should be thankful for the Resurrection of Jesus, the Christ. I should be thinking of His sacrifice and the crucifixion. Even if I am displeased with the ubiquitous nature of the Easter Bunny, I, too, have become distracted by him/it.
The Easter Bunny is our spiritual equivalent of sugar. Filled with calories that provide a quick rush of pleasure, he leaves out any nourishment – there is no message, no hope, no Good News. By the time the plate with the nutritious stuff rolls around, our bellies are achingly full and our teeth are smarting with the sweetness of the world’s pleasures.
No thanks. We really don’t want to hear about some dusty old preacher who revolutionized some dusty old place.
How much better the instant sugar rush that comes with the new dresses, shoes, and pastel purses. So it is with the Easter Bunny. He hops in and hogs the spotlight away from the meaning of Easter. He is not confrontational. He does not ask you to make any decisions or to rethink your life. Why think about Jesus when you are busy posing with the bunny?
My advice – cut the rabbit out of your Easter diet. Go lighter on the goodies, and seek the Good News. Spend time with the loves of your life, and Happy and Holy Resurrection Day. May you be blessed by its true meaning.
Sugar is to your physical health as the Easter Bunny is to your _________. Just thought I’d mix things up with a little analogy. Sugar has been multitasking lately: It’s been in the news almost as much as it’s been in your food. Oh, please! Don’t act like you didn’t know it was in your salad as well as in your ketchup. And please don’t tell me you’ve been putting ketchup on your salad.
I also remind you that it is the season of standardized testing. Easter is here too, even though it took its sweet time. Had it arrived any later, retailers would be juxtaposing pastel candy eggs with red-and-and-blue paraphernalia. Maybe Easter decided to be Indian this year.
Good job trying to dodge the question. So, how would you complete this analogy? Sugar is to your Physical Health as the Easter Bunny is to your _______________…
a) Mental Health
b) Dental Health
c) Spiritual Health
d) Worldly Wealth
Let me help you a little. Immediately, you can cross off Mental Health and Dental Health because those choices rhyme. Test makers don’t want you getting cutesy with them; so don’t expect them to be cutesy with you. No rhymes.
You can cross off Worldly Wealth because there’s way too much alliteration going on, and this is no poetry contest. It’s a test. Remember? Also, you will notice that it is the only one that wavers from an ending of “Health” into “Wealth,” so that should alert you automatically that it must be wrong.
So, by sheer elimination, the correct answer must be c): Spiritual Health. Sugar is to your physical health as the Easter Bunny is to your spiritual health.
Walking through the store this week, I found myself increasingly annoyed by all the sugary treats crowding the aisles. Correction: I am annoyed with myself, and my face probably showed it. I couldn’t smile. Not completely. That’s because my face was still half-numb for the fillings for my cavities. I know. I have shown off about having a sweet tooth. Now I can show off about having decaying teeth.
I deserved it. This school year, I have kept myself awake at odd hours with little “injections” of sugar – mostly that hard cinnamon candy that isn’t the greatest for your dental health or your waistline. What waistline? I know. Yes, there comes a time to pay.
So, I’m walking around, metaphorically and literally in a state of semi-numbness. I am surrounded by chocolate bunnies, marshmallow peeps, pastel-wrapped chocolates, malted eggs, jellybeans, and chocolate crosses, of all things. And these things are jeering at me. Want some more candies, little girl? Or not-so-little girl?
I’m annoyed with myself for being annoyed. I feel like the Scrooge of Easter, but what’s going to be next? Are manufacturers going to give us pastel pasta sauce with which to celebrate the season? How about some cross-shaped noodles?
And again, I’m annoyed at my annoyance. Half way around the world, people are reeling from the after effects of violent earthquakes, aftershocks, tsunamis and nuclear meltdowns. In North Carolina, people are suffering heartache over lost lives and lost homes. I am concerned about the abundance of Easter candy.
The very fact that I can go casually to the store to select foods that are available in abundance, can raise my eyebrow at the ever-inching price of gasoline, (but not to the point that I’ve ditched driving), and can contemplate the price difference between nectarines and peaches, neither of which are local or in season here, is a little dismaying.
How can life be like this? Why do we live in a world with such a dichotomy?
And now I realize the root of my annoyance. I have a myriad of reasons to be overflowing with gratitude. I should be thankful for the Resurrection of Jesus, the Christ. I should be thinking of His sacrifice and the crucifixion. Even if I am displeased with the ubiquitous nature of the Easter Bunny, I, too, have become distracted by him/it.
The Easter Bunny is our spiritual equivalent of sugar. Filled with calories that provide a quick rush of pleasure, he leaves out any nourishment – there is no message, no hope, no Good News. By the time the plate with the nutritious stuff rolls around, our bellies are achingly full and our teeth are smarting with the sweetness of the world’s pleasures.
No thanks. We really don’t want to hear about some dusty old preacher who revolutionized some dusty old place.
How much better the instant sugar rush that comes with the new dresses, shoes, and pastel purses. So it is with the Easter Bunny. He hops in and hogs the spotlight away from the meaning of Easter. He is not confrontational. He does not ask you to make any decisions or to rethink your life. Why think about Jesus when you are busy posing with the bunny?
My advice – cut the rabbit out of your Easter diet. Go lighter on the goodies, and seek the Good News. Spend time with the loves of your life, and Happy and Holy Resurrection Day. May you be blessed by its true meaning.
Amen! Sing it, sister!
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